The REAL privileged life

The past few months have given me true insight into what a privileged life really is. Many of us believe that a life of privilege is one where we can have anything and everything our heart desires, mostly of a material kind and mostly that is true. But what I have come to learn is that, as nice as those things may be, that ultimately what provides us with real joy are the very simple things that cannot be bought on Fifth Avenue.

 

This true joy and fulfillment is not in the brands we buy, but in how we show up for the people that we love and care about.. Each day we get to decide who we want to be. Not only in what we wear on the outside but also in how we look like on the inside. We’ve all heard the saying “it’s what inside that counts” and I have to say that the past few years have awakened within me a true understanding that looks can be deceiving. I have become wiser and have been given new eyes to see the soul of another before I am impressed by their suit, Armani or otherwise.

 

There is a beautiful quote I once heard “Who we are, is God’s gift to us. Who we become, is our gift to God”. As much as we love to shop, as much as we enjoy the latest and greatest styles and looks, the person that we are, our values and how we are towards others is what ultimately shines through us.

 

Ivanka Trump, a woman I admire greatly knows all too well what it is like to come from a very privileged background and to have the best of everything but this savvy business woman is making sure her own daughter does not become entitled or selfish and at 23 months is being taught grounded lessons in life.

 

Life always presents us with opportunities for growth, sometimes we don't see the blessing in the challenge but we always get exactly what we need to become the very best person we could possibly be. Not only the best by societies definition of success but on a deeper level of our spirit, our heart and the very core of who we are to be in this world.

 

Over the past six months I have embarked on "A Course in Miracles", inspired by a cool chick I met in New York who used to be the big deal around town, promoting the hippest clubs, hanging with the coolest people but deep down inside she was afraid of life and more so afraid of love. The "Course" as it's referred to, allowed her to move from living a life of fear to one of love. On the outside she looked like she had it all but deep within, in her own words, she was a total mess. Sometimes life needs to come along and hit us over the head, it may be the only time we would have ever cracked open to find out who we truly are.

 

At times God needs to knock down the walls and come in for a complete renovation and those are the times when we come out of it, maybe for the first time ever, knowing who we are and with an unshakeable faith in ourselves and the greater power that is the real driver of our lives. I have always loved fashion and continue to be inspired by it, yet coming out the other end of what I would call a transformational time in my life, has made me see that the evolution of our soul shines brightly through the evolution of our style and that the best thing you can wear is a designer smile that goes from ear to ear because you have finally found your place in the world by finding out what you're truly made of, and that is a real pleasure and privilege.

 

Love Mia x

The Long and Short of it...

For many years I have been in love with the city, the sounds, the sights and the buzz that makes New York one of the most desired places to visit and to live.  Reaching the age of wisdom for some means downsizing, for others its a sea change (been there done that) and for others it means re-entering the big city that never sleeps and realizing that sleep is not overrated.

 

For many of us women, we have gone from the nights of wearing the shortest skirt possible to knowing when to cover up and exactly what needs to be left to the imagination.  What I have found is that once the novelty of the short skirt has worn off, the long flowing maxi skirt is as welcome as moving to the burbs of Long Island. 

 

 

Just like a change from the mad city to the burbs, I have found that for many of us it takes time to move away from wanting to be noticed for our sex appeal in a mini, to being noticed for our overall appeal in a maxi. 

The bright city lights are no longer cool, but instead we find them too bright.  The cool music coming from the bars is no longer amaaaazing, but instead a little too loud for our sensitive thirty something ears.  Just like the short skirt that once looked oh so hot, now is soooo not!  There is something to be said for dressing like a lady, yes Miranda Kerr looks great in anything she wears from Victoria's Secret lingerie to the shortest of skirts but let's face it, for the rest of us, sometimes we need to have a little bit more discernment as to how we express our inner diva through what we choose to wear.

 

So let's celebrate what it means to reach the age of wisdom, where we finally embrace our femininity and know that it goes far beyond the skimpy and short.  Let's send out a new message that less is not more and redefine how men see us as the special creatures that we are and not just long legs (although hot, yes) but so much more.

 

 

Interview with Gail Elliott......A supermodel who is pretty SUPER!

Getting to know Gail Elliott

 

My guilty pleasure....a glass of Laurent Perrier Champagne.

I love.... my husband and business partner Joe Coffey.

My form of exercise.... walking our dogs along Bondi Beach.

Most ridiculous purchase was/that I ever made.... buying a red Alfa Romeo Spider at 18 years of age when I couldn't yet drive!

My sanctuary is.... our home.

My definition of sexy..... confidence.

 

There are some models that seem to remain "super" way after their days of being a supermodel are over. One of those women I have had the pleasure of interviewing and getting to know a little bit better from an up close and personal view. I have found time and time again, after meeting some incredible women, celebrities, designers and supermodels that they are super nice and underneath the glitz and glamour of it all are gentle, humble and very beautiful both inside and out.

 

Since it's inception the label Little Joe by Gail Elliott, has received global acclaim since its launch in 2002 and features in Australian stores in Sydney, Melbourne and the Gold Coast.

 

But it's birth is just a chapter in a long international career. The British-born stunner has modelled for top designers such as Gianni Versace, Calvin Klein, John Galliano, Dior, Dolce & Gabbana, Ralph Lauren, Gucci and Prada and appeared on the covers of all the leading fashion magazines.

 

Now in her early 40s, Gail is rated among the world's top models for more than 20 years, first rising to fame in a golden era of catwalkers in the 1980s alongside Cindy Crawford and Yasmin Le Bon who she can proudly call her besties.

 

I can proudly say that Gail is an inspiration to many and is one my favourite Private Access Woman mentors helping other women reach their goals and achieve a life that they can be proud of.  As I caught up with Gail I discovered a treasure chest of wisdom she is so eager to share with the world.

WISDOM AND EMPOWERING WOMEN

Q: How would you like to help and empower women today?
A: Co-founding Little Joe Woman and turning my passion for clothing and design into a successful business is empowering in itself. No dream is ever too big or too small!

Q: If anyone can achieve success no matter what their background or circumstances, what do you think holds women back and how can they overcome this?
A: Not having the confidence holds a lot of women back from achieving success. Belief in yourself is the only way to overcome this.

Q: What are some of your personal wisdom, tips and strategies for creating and living a great life?
A: Honesty, being a compassionate person, being humble, putting others before yourself, generosity and being thoughtful are all part of creating and living a great life.

LIFE PURPOSE

Q: What has been the greatest moment achievement in your life so far and why?
A: Little Joe Woman came about from my desire to wear vintage slip dresses and camisoles that were made from more luxurious fabrics. We started with 6 slips and 6 camisoles in 6 colours and have now grown into a fully fashioned clothing company designing everything from butter soft leather jackets to exceptional quality cashmere pieces, and have six stores around Australia and a number of wholesale account both nationally and internationally. After a 24 year career as a model, building this company with my husband and business partner have all been great achievements in my life so far.

Q: Where do you see yourself in 20 years’ time? What is your ultimate dream?
A: In 10 years time I see Little Joe Woman being bought by the Australian equivalent of LVMH...... and Joe, myself and the puppies living in the Caribbean on a yacht....

GOALS AND DREAMS

Q: How did you decide on which goals are worth pursuing?
A: It’s less of a decision and more about the impulses that drive you to achieve what you want most.

Q: When you set out to achieve your goals, how did you know you were on the right path?
A: When you really want to achieve something things start to fall in to place. I wanted to start designing and since then the Little Joe Woman brand has grown and evolved, and will continue to do so.

Q: What techniques do you have that you could share with women to help them achieve their goals? A: Be passionate and focus on what you want to achieve!

Q: What have you had to give up getting to where you are?
A: We’ve had to be very patient.  

 

This is one grounded woman and it's such a privilege to meet someone who believes that her success has been achieved by her hard work, focus and determination and not just luck of being at the right place at the right time.  As the saying goes "I've spent all of my life becoming an overnight success" 

From Hot to Haute

From a very young age many of us women especially growing up under the Aussie sun are led to believe that parading our beautiful sexy bodies is the norm.  That the more we show the sexier and more attractive we are and that being 'hot' is what we all aspire to.

 

As we get older we hopefully realize that there are some parts of us that need to be covered.  Not out of shame for our less than perfect bodies but out of protection of the sacredness of the bodies that we have come to take for granted.  At every turn we see women showing everything that they've got and believing that somehow this is what is desired and wanted in order to find the love, affection, attention and sexual attraction from the opposite sex.  We all want to be desired but have we let ourselves get carried away by believing that all we have to offer is what we are on the outside.  It is no wonder that women these days are riddled with insecurities, eating disorders and a competitiveness which keeps them spending their hard earned money on the next purchase that will hopefully make them feel better in the skin they're in.

 

Having lived on Bondi Beach and on the beaches of the sunny Gold Coast had it's advantages but seeing women parading around in the shortest skirts, the lowest cut dresses and walking through Cavill Mall in as much as a bikini bottom and a tank top has made me redefine what is sexy and what is truly the way to feeling self respect, self love and knowing that not only are you attractive for how you dress but valued for the qualities which reside within. 

 

Over the past few years I have met a new generation of women who want to look sexy but also obey the religious Jewish Orthodox dictates with which they live their life. These women are in no way repressed or do they feel unattractive because the law of modesty is to cover up certain parts of the body.  I have found that these young women are more centered, more grounded and know that they have something of value that goes beyond a short skirt.

In this orthodox community to which I have become accustomed to and a part of women conform to the laws of modesty but look stylish, retaining a “mystique” that “leaves something to the imagination.” One of the laws of modesty asks women to refrain from wearing pants or jeans, for me personally this has been a personal challenge to give up. Some may wonder why live with such laws and restrictions but what I have found on my journey to becoming an observant orthodox woman is that each perceived 'restriction' is really a process of liberation in that it brings one's soul closer to that of God and brings about an inner peace of knowing who you are as a soul and not who you have to be to please someone else or get attention for wearing the shortest and skimpiest clothes.

I recently read about two talented and stylish sisters, who grew up in Sydney, Australia, and are daughters of a Chabad Rabbi. These two sisters run the Frock Swap Shop and help women to look good and to be modest adhering to the orthodox laws of modesty. Chaya Chanin, 26 has always had a passion for finding ways of blending fashion with the laws of modesty. She would take a short dress or a sleeveless or low-cut top and turn it into something modest “while still being fashionable. Her sister, Simi Polonsky, 25, lives in Cleveland and flies to New York every four to six weeks for Frock Swap sales. She said that she has to dress slightly more conservatively in Ohio than in New York. She also said that there are some items the Frock Swap never accepts, such as miniskirts or pants. “We want to help people look good and be modest,” she said.

According to Jewish tradition, Sara Labkowski, the director of a Crown Heights program for young women believes that helping girls dress well is an admirable pursuit. "When we feel well dress, we can do much more, says Sara. "We can be better mothers and wives.

And one of the girls' childhood friend from Australia who visits Frock Swap Sales when in town, is a recent convert to modest dressing.  After acting "like everybody that lived by the beach," she realized she was attracting what she called the wrong type of attention from men. She changed to wearing modest clothes and feels good about the choice.

Some may wonder how someone can feel good about themselves when they are totally covered "modestly" from head to toe and where all their 'assets' are not on show for men to see. According to Liat, a home grown Aussie beach babe, "When I feel like I put an outfit together that looks great and it's working within the boundaries, I am more proud of myself".

From the countless of women that I have met on my journey to becoming more modest myself I have realized that the choice to become modest is a way that we as women honor ourselves and feel proud of who we are deep inside and that are virtues and qualities and not our overly sexualized selves will attract the right people, circumstances and events to us. That if we trust in who we are and in the spirit who made us and guides us daily we can attract the right kind of attention and the right kind of life that we can be proud of. You can look beautiful, stylist and modest.....here is some inspiration.

Happily Ever After.....

 

As women we grow up imagining our happily ever after.  The one which looks like an ad from a Tiffany & Co brochure.  For some it surely happens that way on the outside at least and may last for many years after until the inner voice within begins to realize that the happily ever after they were seeking cannot be found in another ring, Gucci Bag or latest coveted designer brand.

 

This past weekend I came to understand what the true meaning of this phrase that we use for a state that we will experience when we find our man, get everything we think we want and only then dependent on every external factor that we believe will make us truly happy we will finally feel like we are where we want to be....happily ever after.

 

Unfortunately the reality for many is that after having acquired many of these things, deep down their unhappiness and dissatisfaction with life and themselves continues.  People often say "Money doesn't make you happy" usually said by those who have it.  Then there are others who say "I'd rather be poor and happy" like that is the only other option available to them and they keep themselves poor and believing that they are happy when they are struggling through life. We live in a world where somehow we have come to believe that it must be one or the other and that our happiness and joy lie in the acquisition of things or money or getting rid of them all to find peace.

 

So much importance is placed on body consciousness  believing that this is "I", this is who "I" am.  Body Consciousness, separation, seeing the other as different and separate keeps all of us afraid and focused on how we are better, special and different - a trick of the ego to keep us living in fear and separate to others.  In this world of Fashion that I love so much sometimes can make us more intolerant and often afraid that we are not enough, don't have enough and must be more to fit in and be loved by someone somewhere just by wearing the right brands and if we get the fit right then we've made it in this game of life.

 

I realized this weekend that happily ever after is a place within your heart and deep within your soul. It means finding your own center and despite what happens you are able to keep your joy and go about life peacefully and gracefully knowing that you are connected to the creator, spirit and are always taken care of no matter what life looks like on the outside.

 

The Bride all dressed in White is coming to her own wedding and uniting with the love that she has for her own self, her soul and realizing that she can create her own happily ever after because no matter how much we look for it in a man, a bag or a brand we must take the journey within to truly shine our light.

 

This weekend I spent away in the Mountains at a Meditation Retreat run by the Brahma Kumaris.  A beautiful spiritual haven for people who come to find the inner peace within by realizing that we are soul and through meditation we can connect every day to our soul consciousness and not live in our body consciousness.  We can connect to the supreme soul, God, Spirit whatever it may be to you.  I found out that our happiness comes from a deep place within and if you rely on circumstances of your life to make you ok and happy, what will happen when life's circumstances are not so pleasing.  Relying on your external world, other people and circumstances to be perfect is not realistic, things happen as we know and most of us have no way to deal with them or we do but are so affected by them that life becomes one struggle after another, one drama after another.

 

I am glad to say that I am now living my Happily ever after......all dressed in white has taken on a new meaning for me and whether it's a different shade of white from Korrs, Gap, Just Jeans or Calvin Klein that once we find our real source of happiness that we can wear any brand because what we shine and give out to the world is WHO we are first and then the brands we wear look all that much better.

 

 

Om Shanti (I am Peace)

 

All roads lead to Rome

 

Growing up I often heard the words "All roads lead to Rome" and it got me thinking the other day whether our life should be one straight path or whether a life full of zig zags is just as good if not better.  Last night I was reading The Abraham Teachings which tell us that life is meant to feel good for us and if it doesnt, our internal guidance system will wake us up and send the alarm that something is not quite right.  Unfortunately many of us don't often listen to how we feel or take the time to become aware of what we are doing in our life as such we live out by old patterns that we've outgrown but are still perpetuating in our lives because they feel known and safe.

 

If you've ever put on an itchy sweater or a pair of jeans that is just a little too tight you would understand the feeling of it not being quite right, a little too squeezy or itchy and it certainly doesn't make us feel like we are ready to take on the world in a pair of jeans which we can barely squeeze into, yes even if they are your favourite Sass & Bides.  Fashion like life needs to feel good, it needs to fit and most of all it must be right for you.  I am often amazed at how us women can fall prey to buying the latest and greatest when it soooo doesn't even suite us, doesn't make us look great or feel amazing but we squeeze our little bodies into it just so we can 'fit in'.

 

Fitting in is overrated, living your best life is the greatest pleasure of earth.  People will try to hold you back, they will try very hard to bring you down and they will attempt to control you because you shining your bright little light into the world and being happy is a threat to their very existence and  unfortunately they have not realised that there is another way to Rome, if only they were courageous enough to take that road and see where the path takes them.  It could be Rome, Melbourne, Gold Coast or it could be Miami, one is not better than the other because ultimately after all the zigs and the zags all that matters is love.  To love life, to love yourself, to love others, to love what you wear, to love what you do, to love the people around you and to love God.

 

To some my life has always seemed a little zig zaggy but I have realised that it was a perfect unfolding for me to experience life through travelling to unknown destinations, to engage with people from different cultures and ethnicities.  I have come to see that people are beautiful, I always had that youthful and at times naive outlook when it came to others.  I could always see the greatness that someone had even if what they were living was a far cry from who they truly were.  Somewhere along the road back to Rome or maybe from it I forgot that we are all a divine spark of the creator, I began to focus on the negatives, something I picked up from someone by osmosis.  What I now see is that it is much more enjoyable seeing the deliciousness of each person and the good that they bring to our lives.

 

Next time you encounter a person who seems to be on a mission to hurt you, know that they are simply crying out for help, attention and trying to get love but just have no idea how to.  I would have to say that many of us didn't receive the love we needed growing up.  Perhaps our parents just did our best but didn't know how to give us what we so needed.  Some of us take the path to Rome to discover who we are, others travel the globe in search to finally meet the right people at the right time in the right place that can show us what true unconditional love and family is all about so finally we know we have a place in the world, we fit, we belong and just like finding that perfect dress that doesn't itch and doesn't scratch we get to a place of what a partner used to call "cushy comfy" or maybe that is what "Rome" represents when you hear that famous saying "All roads lead to Rome".

 

In Rome, the only true constructed roads were built by the Roman empire, these lead to and from the city at the center of the empire, Rome. So, quite literally all roads led to Rome..... and all roads leads us back to our center, our own empire no matter the roads we take and the zig zags that we must endure.

Your best foot forward for 2013

Although the holiday break wasn't too much of a holiday, for me anyway, you begin to realise how much you need some time out just for you. I recently went away for a weekend where there was no contact with the outside world and no reception. That meant I couldn't check my instagram, facebook, emails, blogs or messages constantly throughout the day. It was just me and what I was doing in the present moment. At the beginning I was wondering if I'd miss something important or I needed to know something that I couldn't. As I relaxed I realised we all need that time out in life, where no one or nothing else matters but our pure happiness. We can sit back, silently and listen to what our heart and soul tells us and where it leads us to go. It might be happy and content with the present or it might be yearning for something greater and waiting for that little spark inside of us to bloom. 

The New Year is always a time where resolutions are made to be kept or broken. A lot of the time these resolutions are exercise more, eat healthy, call friends that live far away, get a better job, make more money, but they are never so simple as be happy. This year I am going to make time to turn off all contact and enjoy life at its simplest from time to time. Go for walks along the ocean, hold hands with loved ones, enjoy the beauty of our surroundings and make other people happy. No matter what your resolutions are or where they are leading you stay true to you and what you want from life. Looking your best might be your goal for this year, but make sure you're doing it for you, to be a healthier version of you. Pin up mood boards and quotes to keep you on track and at the end of the day make sure you put your best foot forward.

Start with small realistic goals that consist of either weekly, monthly or even daily things that you can do to make yourself a better version of you for 2013. Don't think of what others resolutions are or what you think yours should be. Sometimes as humans we aren't made to be content and happy with ourselves as we have that inside instinct that pushes us to go further. But it is ok to take time out and be a little selfish and take pride in your own happiness and accomplishments. Find a job this year that will make you never work a day in your life because when you spend so much time at a place, why be there if it isn't making you a better and healthier person at the end of the day. I believe in the quote that if you smile to the world but the world will smile back at you. Smile as soon as you wake up and realise that 2013 is your oyster. I know, 2013 has already begun but I'm not a believer in changing overnight. It doesn't get to midnight New Years Eve and your suddenly a refreshed version of yourself, it takes time. And if you don't want anything to change for 2013, if you're truly satisfied now with everything you've got in life then simply don't change a thing at all.